Breast Milk vs Formula

Over the course of the last year, because I recently gave birth via cesarean to a beautiful widdle girl, my best friend and I have gone around and around about formula vs. breast milk. She, being and advocate for "the breast is best", I on the side of personal choice and happiness for both my child and myself. Through all the research between the both of us, there are some things that stand out that I really don't like.

It's the battle over who is a better mother? It's true that once you let it be known that you are pregnant and sign up for any baby magazine, baby register and sign into a hospital's Labor and Delivery, right away you are asked, "Do you plan to breast or formula feed?" The hospitals (in many of them) give out gift bags full of formula samples. If you signed up for anything on the internet, your email inbox is overflowing with coupon offers and free sample offers from Emfemil, Similac and Gerber.

You may read one or all of them, I don't know but I do know that on every article, every ad and every package of formula, formula offers, and information on formula, you will read, "breast milk is best". Now, they say that in areas where formula is heavily marketed, there are more women who formula feed instead of breast feed. They say that the demographics don't matter, rich, poor, black, white, Hispanic, urban, rural, suburbs... it doesn't matter, the result is that where there is more marketing for formula, there are more women using it.

Some of the many articles I have read over the internet say things like, "Breast milk babies are more intelligent than formula fed babies." That really made me mad because it's not true. It is not true in anyway no matter how someone wants to take a study and manipulate it to achieve the desired result. That being that the "Breast Milk is Better" campaign doesn't need to say things that are untrue. Every woman, all formula makers, all doctors, nurses, moms etc., know that breast milk is better because contains Mama's antibodies that keep baby healthy and it doesn't cost anything... I am sure so many of you have already heard and already know.

So what about the mama's who can't breastfeed for whatever reason. What if they just don't want to and feel more comfortable with the bottle? Oh so many blogs I have read from women making women who formula feed look or feel like bad mothers. They go on and on about why breast milk is better but it is done is such a way that they quite literally do it by making women who formula feed for whatever reason, feel guilty or like they are neglecting their kids, or that breastfeeding mothers are better mothers and it just isn't true.

Now, I was talking to my friend about how breast is best campaigns don't have to manipulate information to get people to do what they think is best. Lying isn't the way to do it, manipulating percentages to make something like, "Formula fed babies are 20% more likely to get leukemia." Instead of saying, breastfed babies are 17% less likely to get leukemia.

Does it make a difference? Of course it does. It makes a difference to every mother who is breast milk challenged. It makes a difference to the woman, who for any reason have or chose to formula feed. And why do Breast Milk campaigns need to go there? You don't see formula companies saying things like formula is best or formula fed babies are smarter or formula fed babies are healthier. No, because that is not the point of formula and it would be lying.

The fact of this matter is that it is a product, one that does have a place in our culture so it does have to be marketed. Don't get me wrong, I think breastfeeding is wonderful and wouldn't tell any mom that formula is better. That is just silly! But I also wouldn't lie or intentionally manipulate statistics because "you" yourself believe with your whole heart that breast milk is best.

It's a choice and both are fine choices and mamas shouldn't be out there trying to compare their mothering to each other, we all have different methods and ideas about what is best for our own families and it is a travesty that women, because of the whole, breast milk vs. formula controversy, aren't being as supportive or encouraging as we should otherwise be.

Interestingly, I had someone make a comment on a small debate about this very thing and she said,

"Whatever you do when you are a mother you get grief. If you breast feed people worry that the baby isn't getting enough milk and they are squeamish about you doing it in public, even if you have a blanket over everything. If you formula feed then they beat up on you for not breast feeding. Our culture says it celebrates Moms but it doesn't, not really." - Pamela Grundy

And does it? Does or Western Culture actually celebrate women? No, these days women are against women in some game of "I am better than you because I..." If we aren't consumed by what our bodies should look like or how our skin should look, or what clothes are most flattering or if your breast are too big or too small... our culture doesn't really sound like it does at all, does it?

As women, we usually do want to feel accepted. Most people want to feel accepted but after having a baby especially, we want to feel good about our new shapes, our new looks and the choices we make. We want to know that we are still beautiful and that we are being supported for whatever choices we do make because pregnancy and raising (especially for first time moms) a child is hard.

It's incredibly stressful and while breast milk is best, formula is not going to kill your baby and you aren't a bad mother for choosing it and you should ignore any woman or campaign that makes you feel uncomfortable or says things like, "breastfed babies are more intelligent". No, that is not true.

What is true about breast milk is the antibodies that protect your child from illness and even then it doesn't mean your child won't get sick. Nutrients. Breast milk contains the right balance of nutrients for you baby but even that isn't always true if the mother isn't getting the right nutrients herself. If the mother thinks her baby isn't getting the right nutrition, she might even check with the doctor in which case the doctor might prescribe supplements such as vitamin D.

And on the contrary, formula feeding doesn't mean your child will get sick. Let me restate that, all kids get sick regardless of which feeding choice you make. So what it boils down to when nurturing and parenting is that you care for the child. In everything that I have read, the single most influential factor in how a child grows up has nothing to do with whether your breastfed or formula fed, it has to do with love and closeness and your baby does not have to be at the breast to be close but all professionals will agree that skin to skin contact is important. That reading to your child and helping your child make progress is important, that having a happy home is important.

So, if you are a woman who is feeling guilty about formula feeding from all the negative information you may or may not have read, feel assured that only you can make the choice that is best for YOU and YOUR BABY. It's your family.

I, for one, am an advocate for "Happy Families" because even though we all make mistakes, I strongly believe that raising your kids in a happy environment where you communicate and encourage each other, where you love and support one another will always triumph over the mistakes we make and produce happier, healthier babies in the long run.

So stop making breastfeeding mothers feel guilty about feeding in public or giving them grief when they are tired and frustrated because breastfeeding is hard work. Stop making formula feeding mothers feel guilty for not breast feeding but be supportive of each other and our roles as mothers.

The facts are: Breast milk contains the mothers anti-bodies that protect your baby from diseases but doesn't mean they are immune to the common cold. If the mom hasn't been vaccinated for or if the mother is not immune to chicken pox, then neither is your child.

If the mother doesn't have a proper diet, neither does your child however, the baby will take from you whatever he/she can but this might take a toll on mom and mom also needs to be looked after.

Breast milk is easier to digest.

Formula does not contain those the same anti-bodies as breast milk but it does contain ingredients to help boost their immune system.

Formula fed babies, excuse me, bottle fed babies have more digestive problems because formula itself cannot be sterilized however the main reason is because of improper preparation. Meaning, those germs are mostly coming from bottles that aren't cleaned or sterilized properly and because formula spoils fast and is an awesome medium for bacterial growth so if you accidentally give your child formula that has been sitting out for over an hour or you didn't store it right, then your baby will probably get a stomach ache. And what doctors are really concerned with is dehydration or constipation. Yet this can also happen with breast fed babies as well. If it happens the treatment for both is the same.

BOTTLE fed babies, not FORMULA fed babies are more likely to get ear infections. Ear infections have nothing to do with formula but the method of bottle feeding because bottle fed babies are usually held almost flat and many women still choose to put their babies to bed with a bottle which makes it easier for the milk to get into their ear canal. Also, just to note, it usually doesn't come in through the outside of the ear but comes in through the inside of the ear.

Formula feeding doesn't mean your child will become obese. I have read studies that link formula to obesity because babies that are formula fed tend to eat more however, at that age, a plump baby doesn't mean they will be obese. Obesity is a product of unhealthy eating or genetic disorders but mostly it's due to improper nutrition and you can thank the food industry for that. But as a parent, it is your job to make sure you are giving your baby the proper nutrition and for all intent and purposes, they need exercise just like we do. And this also goes for the study that tries to link diabetes to formula.

A child's intelligence is partly genetic but mostly a product of how much the parent puts into helping them learn. There are so many conclusive studies that show that when you read to your child and talk to your child, you get smarter more cognitive children. Whether breast or formula, there is no conclusive study that can suggest that a baby will reach certain intellectual milestone before another. All children develop at different rates and the biggest differences are between male and female development and even then it doesn't mean that because you have a boy, he will learn to walk faster than the girl or one will start talking before the other.

In my opinion, the only reason breast milk is best is because of the anti-bodies it contains which formula just cannot offer. Though, I thought I should note that the colostrum that the mother produces at first contains those immune properties so any amount you can give them goes a long way.

Other than that, it really is up to mom to decide what is best for HER and her child. Breastfeeding mama's, don't feel bullied into having to hide in public while feeding your baby. Formula or bottle feeding mama's, don't let women with superiority complexes make you feel like you did something wrong.